Category Archives: pain

Peach State says: Anchors of Friendship

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I wish you could meet me friends…they are the best! They are there when I call and there when I don’t. They lift me up whether I need it or not. They give me a reason to laugh and smile and share in my times of tears. I love my friends…they are my Anchors in Friendship!

First let me say that I have a group of within a group! Don’t shake your head…I have mentioned before that I have a strong core group of friends. With the love of cooking and sharing recipes to cleaning tips and hints to help in the raising of children…we all input guidance and knowledge. Isn’t this what friends do…no matter the situation. We share the funny and important stuff with those we care about because they may have a future need for the information we gave them. So let me break it down for you!

There is the group that I talk to occasionally. These are the ones I may talk to once in a blue moon because of distance. We talk and there is an automatic pick up where we left off mentality. We were close when we lived close to each other but…living across the country from each other can cause a few problems. Facebook has been wonderful with keeping the lines of communication open. Before we only had snail mail and phone calls.

There is the group that I still talk to from churches in the area. They are few in number and seem to evaporate after time. I have one I still see and talk to but…it just isn’t the same. (I have only been at three churches in the area…two of which were never really a fit)

This next group is the group with a group! Some of them have been there for the past 10+ years, since moving to this area, and have grown into the deepest, family replacing, type of friends. I could not go through my day without talking to them at least once. This little group has increased in the past few years to include new personalities that, to me, feel like they were meant just for me. “You know who you are!” (take a moment to give yourself a hug and know that I love each of you very dearly and keep reading)

There are days that the phone is attached to my ear…if we are not together in person. This is the group that we are talking on the phone with them as we walk across the parking lot or church building to see them. This group is centered around my church and my faith. We sing together…often break out into silly laughter together. ( Oh Where is My Hairbrush?) Sorry…I was just thinking about our recent time together and it brought a warmth to my heart. This group is consistent and supportive. They are my Anchors of Friendship!

The bonds this group shares is not an isolated occurrence. This type of friendship happens at churches and schools around the world. You may have a similar group that anchor you. When you feel like things could not be worse…they are right there for you…holding you hand and picking you up. They don’t ask for explanations…they just give you support and love! They are quiet when you are quiet and rowdy when you are rowdy. “We tend to be rowdy a lot lately!” The interesting thing about my wonderful group is the differing personalities. We are not of the same age group…they have not clue who my husband is but, would love him if he would give the opportunity to them. Backgrounds and life experiences are packed full of delights and tragic events. We are more alike than we may realize.

I am really a very blessed person to have this group of God given friends. I wish I could tell them how I feel…but…we are always to busy singing and laughing! The joy that flows from my heart when I think about them fills my day and eases the struggles that I encounter on a daily basis. “Some of this group understand the intricacies of my life.”

Through this group we have other friends with whom we associate with even outside church activities. We are really an interesting bunch of ….delinquents…no! That seems a little young and harsh…grapes. “I like that!”. I used to not understand that concept when I first heard my Aunt and Uncle talk about their group this way. Think about it for a second…always in a bunch…there may be some that are bruised and some not fully ripened and some that are just right…all together they are wonderful. They continue to grow and multiply and become a hardy, rooted plant just like friends. Anchors in Friendship are long lasting and true!

I hope you can take an opportunity to tell your friends how much you appreciate them today! Everyone needs to smile at least once a day! Until the next time…have a great day!

Peach State

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Peach State says: The Best Things in Life!

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Each day we are told what we must have to be successful and happy. The new car, jewelry, that vacation resort package… But what about those of us who do not have the luxury to have those things. Why are we still happy? Not the superficial happiness but the deep down in your heart happy! “I know!” We have realized that “The Best Things in Life” are not things at all! They cost…your time, your love, and your care.

This is not going to be a “I’m am so broke” type of story. The truth is we may be able to do more but just choose not to. The various reasons for this are the schedules we keep and the children still at the house. I would love to go on a vacation! I have a beach house I can use anytime I would like to, within reason. “I may actually get to go this summer.” I don’t want the flashy jewelry…it could get lost working in the yard. The new car…okay…What kind would I like? I would love a new car…but I have a car to drive that is decent. This is about the little things we do for those we love…it does not cost a lot of money but can cost time. Making time is sacrificial any way you look at it but, the rewards benefit those touched by this time given. It is about taking care of each other! Doing for others…letting others do for you. Give and take is not equal but balanced. I guess I am on the receiving end right now. How do I know this statement is true…well…

Saturday night: My husband tried to wake me up after watching TV. “I sometimes fall asleep for about 30 minutes in the evening but for some reason I could not keep my eyes open.” It took him several tries to stir me. He has noticed a change in my sleep habits at night and knows that I do not get the rest I need. He put his proverbial foot down! You will stay home tomorrow and you and I will spend time together. You will not have any alarms set…complete rest…
When my husband notices my lack of sleep he begins to watch me. I have only learned this about my husband in the past 5 years. He makes light and uses humor as an excuse but, I know what he is doing. He has seen the wincing and painful looks cross my face and hide in my laughter. He has watched as my diet has changed as I confess I didn’t feel like eating.

Sunday: Well…no alarm set and I still got up early. “Not as early as I usually would on a Sunday!”
I made the coffee and our lattes’ and headed back upstairs. He told me he was taking me to breakfast…”Go get ready and I will take my meds.” We woke up the 18 year old to watch the 11 year old and left. It was a pleasant drive and since his returning to work our time together is definitely precious. After being seated the concern was voiced. It came down to his feeling I was overdoing it…pushing myself for others and forgetting about me. “I do that…that’s me!” I know I am not as young as I used to be…but that doesn’t mean I can’t still… “I was cut off!” I know you are in pain and it is from over doing it! It has not come from working at the house…he stopped knowing I knew he was referring to church. I have been involved in a number of projects that called for more physical brute strength on top of the normal everyday activities. These additions to my schedule along with the extra practices would take this conversation one way… I quickly beat him to the punch and said “I know how you feel and I will do my best to lessen the manual labor during my daily activities. I will make sure I rest and eat properly.”

All of this to say…I knew my husband was doing this out of love. He is not a very nurturing type of personality…but he has his days. I have learned to see through the cracking of jokes and see his fear and concern. I have learned to hear the undertones in his conversation and the read between the lines. This intervention of sorts came from his heart. I know he could not live without me…
“Who would take care of the dry-cleaning and fixing of meals and…” (insert laughter here)

When I turned my phone on for the first time I did notice the unbridled worry from three of my BFFs. Let me say to them…”I am sorry I could not reply as I should have!” I respected the time my husband set aside for us and did not take time away from us. I know you were worried and apologize to you now and more personally in a little while. The fact that they checked on my absence is one of “The Best Things in Life!” “Thank You!”

The small amount of time together with those we love and hold dear are precious. The smile in passing may turn someone’s day completely around. The pat on the back and holding of doors are often seen as nothing but nice manners. I love the line in the movie “While You Were Sleeping” when the characters are talking about doing for others. The topic of giving up a seat and letting a woman sit down may have seemed trivial but not to the woman able to sit down. We never know who will be touched by the little things we do. A kind word, a helping hand, a smile may be just little things but, when done with a loving heart they are priceless. Nothing is ever small! It doesn’t matter if they are close to us or someone we may not know…it is just a way to share “The Best Things in Life”.

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Peach State

Peach State says: Life is Like a Box of Chocolates

The anticipation of choosing the right box of chocolates, to give, is filled with decisions. Milk or Dark…Truffles or just plain old assortment…We might even pick the box based on the way the package is designed. So many choices…just like the individual pieces in the box!

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The box is opened and the sight is laid out before you as a buffet. Each piece, decorated and detailed, in little chocolate cradles. There are dangers and hazards to avoid in this collection of cavities waiting to be devoured. Eyes widen as big as the teeth exposed smile and you reach in…
You bite into it and “YUM”!

The pleasure filled experience is…well…”YUM!” Relishing the first piece and closing the box is the next hurdle to jump. “Exercise is always a good activity to enjoy while holding a box of chocolates!” Moderation is key when receiving a box of chocolates. How long can you make it last? We had competitions, as children, to see who could have their candy the longest. The pleasure from the first selection has faded and we quickly open the box again to replace the feeling. Do you find yourself going from experience to experience in hopes of having another “YUM!” That is no way to live. We have to experience good and bad to appreciate the good as well as learn how to maneuver the bad.

The uncharted delicacies laid out are tempting but…what about that piece? The one filled with chewy caramel…”OUCH!” Broken tooth or your filling is pulled out are two of my not so fond memories of the delicious treat. Just because it looks good it may cost you in the long run. You know the painful trip to the dentist and the painful experience at the desk as you pay for the visit. The decision is made and the memory is stored…”No more of that piece!” The lessons we learn are needed…to guide us in the future.

So no caramel pieces anymore…What about this piece? We bite into it, cautiously, and “YUCK!”
Spitting the chocolate buttercream out quickly and rush to get the taste out of our mouths. Okay…so I am not a fan of this flavor but you may be…The point is there are those issues that give us a bad taste and we find ourselves searching in haste as we spit and sputter at the situation. My advice..if you don’t like buttercream then don’t eat it.

Our delight in the box starts to fade and a decision must be made. Throw caution to the wind and just eat them all, throw the remains away to avoid the temptation, or share. You could end up disappointed in yourself if you inhale the tidbits of joy but you don’t want to seem ungrateful and throw the unwanted treasure away. I say share! We are all different and that maple or buttercream delicacy is just the piece someone else is looking for. You will be helping someone and yourself when you share what you have with others. Those little pick me ups during our day or week strengthen our resolve to complete the tasks ahead. “Nod your head…you know what I mean…don’t you?” Whether a distraction or interaction between friends, these times of sharing with another give us the chance to breath and recharge. Sometimes the best things come in small packages. Just a smile or chuckle is all it takes!

Well you may have realized I am a poker! I poke every piece of chocolate to see if it is one I want. At least I used to be this person. I have finally reached a place in my life that I know my limitations. The beautifully displayed assortment of joy is not for me. I am a simple girl with simple wants. Dark chocolate, sugar free, on sale! Yep..that is simple! Dark chocolate keeps my husband out of my stash as well as sugar free. He needs his to be sugar free but complains of aftertaste. “He is too picky!”. On sale…if you can’t afford it you don’t buy it! That is a blog title if ever I heard one!
Knowing our limitations while still reaching for the dream is an asset to hold on to. Remain strong and capable in your choices. Charging into a dream could land you in Buttercream and, if you don’t test it first, you may end up trying to get the bad taste out of your mouth. This could cause you to draw back and recoil from the dream. Don’t let this happen…poke it first…to see if it is Buttercream or something worth eating.

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Life is to be experienced…the full spectrum of emotion! Every piece of candy must be tried once to have the full experience. There will be those pieces you search for and love and those you really want nothing to do with but deal with. Families are like a box of chocolates!</em. That makes sense! We are unique in many ways but look for those who share the same likes and dislikes. Friendships are built on similarities with the occasional Buttercream thrown in for fun. Don’t throw your box away…share the life experience with others. You may be giving yourself that needed break without even knowing it.

Have a great day and may you find all your favorite tidbits of joy today!

Peach State

Heart of Dixie says . . . War Eagle anyway

OUCH!

That was a whole new level of pain.  And I’m not talking about the football game or the forthcoming year of torture among a sea of rabid recknecks.

My very good friend is a massage theapist.  She worked on my neck last night until the knots just melted away.  I could move without pain.  I cried I was so happy.

Then the pain came back.  With a vengeance.  I cried again.  To top it off my roomie had invited Alabama fans (Alabama fans!) to watch the game at our house.

It become unbearable – the pain, I mean.  Well, the football, too.  So I left.  Came to a quiet place.  The serenity felt better, but the pain was only worse.

Ever notice how pain gets worse when you feel safe to show it?  When you take the happy friendly face off and let your guard down?  Of maybe that doesn’t happen to you.

I’ve had pain before.  Goodness knows.  But this neck thing is nearly intolerable.  Knees and ankles just cannot compare.  I think I understand how people get hooked on drugs.

Well anyway, I was wondering if sometimes things get worse before they get better.  I was wondering if I should keep at the massage.  At least there was a change.  Lord knows our bodies don’t like change.  Maybe it’s rebelling against something that is good for it.

For now, I hope I can hold it together enough today to think clearly and write quickly about stuff I simply do not understand.

War Eagle anyway (yes, I know Auburn didn’t play, but I’m also for anybody who plays Alabama, especially in a championship game).  War Eagle, and here’s to a new day.

Heart of Dixie says . . . I decided not to post this on facebook…but I wanted to say it anyway.

I was so excited this morning, and now I’m just full of disdain for all those perfect little cheerful posts out

there.  I’m pretty sure the inner grumpiness is caused by the physical pain, but still.  How can all of y’all be so perfect all the time?  I don’t believe you.  I used to pretend to be perfect, too.