Monthly Archives: January 2012
What dictates style? A flair for the unique like seen on the runways of Fashion Week? I would like to venture that we all have a flair for stylish fashion. A flair that is unique to us and works to make us feel beautiful. “We all have a Flair for Style!”
I have a friend, who I consider part of my close-knit group, that is quite unique in her fashion style. I could not attempt the styles she wears for several reasons. We need to realize that each of us are not the runway model, for the most part, and see ourselves as flawed in some way or another. I am too skinny, I am too fat, I am too tall, I am too short, Where is my waist? We have a hard time being satisfied with who we are on the outside and forget we are beautiful on the inside.
I struggle with my outside beauty but know, thanks to being ever reminded by my wonderful grandmothers and my mother, that I am very beautiful because of my heart. I know it sounds a bit corny and you have probably heard it before!
If we use our heart to view ourselves and those around us we will see things in a whole new and improved way. I hate having my picture taken and I do not like my smile…but there are pictures of me that I love! My husband and I had our picture taken about three years ago and the look on my face is one I had never seen before. He said “That is the smile I see all the time.” We are too critical of ourselves and need to accept and move on. I look at my friend who lost a few pounds and everyone just gushes over her. ” I lost over five times more than she did and still am not that small!”. Reality check…I never was that small…and never will look like that! Know your limitations!
I love trying to copy different styles I see…within my economic boundaries of course. It is fun to sport new looks and not limit yourself to one idea or look. Take a chance and be bold! I recently saw a picture on my FaceBook with Miss Piggy from the Muppets sporting a peacock skirt and lacy top. She had a cute hat with her ears sticking through. If the picture had shown her shoes they would have been stylish too! She has a real flair for fashion….but face it…who has a waist that small…( insert laughter here). I have not seen too many people wearing peacock skirts and do not want to be one of them. I guess I am conservative in my fashion…but not too conservative!
“We all have a Flair for Style!”
Try new things and take a chance on changing your style. It can be the use of accessories or use of colors. Have fun with it and make yourself feel good first. When we feel good about how we look we tend to shine from within. We just have to remind ourselves that “We all have a Flair for Style!”
“I said “NO!”, “Read my lips…”, “What did I just say?”
All of these phrases are spoken on a daily basis to my 11 year old. What part of “NO” does he not understand? He peers at me with a freakish playful smile as his eyes dance with thoughts of what he will do next. This is not a sweet smile! I have seen that smile! He bounces like a “Tigger” having to be reminded of his every day tasks…he talks to himself and sings, badly, his little made up songs. “He can’t remember lyrics to most songs so he improvises…” Some days the noise level, mixed with the activity level, are just too much. “Do you know what “NO” means?” The annoying way he behaves drives me to the point I wish could just hide. “Can I just go back to bed and pretend that none of this happened?”. I could pull the soft cotton shield up around me and snuggle in, protected from the piercing ramblings of nonsense. There is no place to hide! The high pitched sound drifts throughout every corner of the house into my poor ears.
How many times must this simple little word be spoken? I understand that he is ADHD and that his mind is moving “faster than a speeding bullet”. He is worse than most toddlers in comprehension of this little word. He unplugs things and gives me that devilish grin and says “Oh…it’s plugged in…I thought it was stuck!”. “Really?”. He did this today with a new light we bought yesterday. Pretty little LED lights, that are motion activated, were placed in the hall upstairs and one in the hall downstairs. He was even with us when we bought them!
Please do not assume that I just don’t understand ADHD and the behavior children have with this disability. It runs in my family and allows us to be the people we are today. I have also worked with Special Ed. in a school setting giving me an insight into the diverse disabilities more severe than ADHD.
The laughter that dances in his devilish grin as he continues his morning routine is purely by choice. He knows what needs to be done…and yet..avoids following directions and requests… “Do you know what “NO” means?” I can turn to continue preparing my husband’s lunch and he will start up again. He just drives on, like the “Energizer Bunny”, spinning and stomping. Any noise that can be made must be made louder and repeated. He chooses not to follow directions…he chooses not to speak respectfully to adults at school and at home.
I remember dealing with my other sons when they were little. They are very close in age and the trouble they could find to get into…sorry…I promised myself I would not dredge up those memories. Balancing those three, very active, personalities was hectic at times. But moms just learn how to cope and teach at the same time. Habits were formed and continued! The daily shuffle became an orchestrated dance filled with love and laughter.
“Willful Refusal” is the term his teachers have used this school year. He chooses to act this ways and sees nothing disturbing about his choice. The hour long conversations fall on deaf ears and only tear the rest of the family down. “Do you know what “NO” means?”
We have tried it all…time out, sentences, loss of activities, grounding, loss of TV and computer. We even took the TV and computer from his room and told him they could be earned back. We talked with him and discussed the ways he could get these items back…and did he try…”NO!”
We feel like we are in a free-fall having lost the grip on the end of our rope! The doctors, he frequents on a monthly and quarterly basis, all agree it is his choice. I still see no changes and a downward spiral out of control. I desperately seek methods that will help him. He is a very smart little boy and has a creative personality. Any suggestions?
I often wonder what it would be like to time travel with Doctor Who in his Tardis. Go anywhere and see anything on a whim without having to obtain a passport or take out loans to pay for the trip. The places only found in our imaginations…the colors and scenes majestically displayed for our pleasure. The sculpted gardens intertwined with stain glass blooms dancing on the breeze. The delicate backdrop stretching, like pastel taffy, in all directions as the sun moves across the sky.
I have a list of places to go…things I would have to see…people in time important to me.
I don’t want to bore you with my dreams…you have your own and they are the ones your should be dreaming about.
I know this would be selfish to run off in The Tardis with my very own time traveler…BUT…a girl can dream can’t she? Where would you go? What time would you want to travel to?
Take a moment just for yourself….before returning to the life we each lead everyday…
The vicious circle started again this morning with the waking sound, of the song I am singing for this Sunday’s Special, bursting forth from the alarm. “It is a good thing I was beginning wake up because the song is a delicate and slow moving instrumental.”. Up and we’re off….down the stairs and to the coffee pot. Zap the coffee! Let the princess dog out….sip the zapped coffee! Check my usual sights on the iPhone because the computer is acting up! Back to the kitchen with a zig and a zag…reminding myself to fold the dish towels that are on the Dinning Room table. “Oh and I need to check the clothes in the dryer…hubby needs socks….at least they are clean!”. Breakfast delivered and socks paired and placed in the appropriate drawer. Towels folded and placed in the decorative metal bowl on the counter. Breathe! Sip the brew!!! Breathe!
A typical morning, with an array of uncompleted projects mixed in, has placed me in “Game Plan” mode. The added good fortune of possible visitors provides all incentive to complete these varied odd jobs. Hubby is getting ready for work and youngest son is off to school…items stacked in the Dinning Room need to be moved later! “That is going to be a lovely job for a pair of strapping young men”. Move some furniture around in my office and….take a few sips of the wonderfully blended nectar…”Sorry!”…my latte’. Hubby leaves for work and suggests I rest and try to feel better! “Right!” That is top of my list honey!
I am not your typical “chicken with it’s head cut off” running around in a whirlwind of unaccomplished tasks. I accepted the mission and watched to tape destroy itself. (Mission Impossible reference). I have already gained momentum and am in the home stretch…I am so “Ahead of the Game!”.
This is very encouraging and I am motivated to get dinner started and let it cook all day. At this rate I may even dust. “Who likes to dust?”. The roofers three doors down are beginning to create a rhythm, of sorts, that has been going on for three days. The clouds are slowly filling the canopy of nature outside my window. This will slow their progress down in completing their job today.
As for me, My hope is to finish proofing my book today and begin the rewrite. I would love to pass it along to two people for final proofing and suggestions next week. I have high hopes but may have to make time for “Ear Candle” therapy. The ringing in my ears is beginning to muffle the slightest of sounds. The beating of my heart and the faint sounds coming from my typing are the only sounds I can presently hear. The rat-a-tat from the roofers has all but disappeared with the growing ringing in my ears. “I hate my sinuses!”. I will be able to use this time, milking the fact of not feeling my best, and focus on my book. I can remain “Ahead of the Game!”
Today is going to be a great day! My car is getting picked up later and will be repaired! My house will be cleaner than usual! My book will be worked on…and in the final stages! I will be spoiled and pampered by family, in hopes I don’t get sick! “I know timing is crucial with singing this weekend!” Moving past that idea of failure quickly in overcoming fashion. It is all in the frame of mind…keeping my mind set on the game plan and moving gallantly onward. An “Army of One”!
We have to remain focused on the tasks laid before us each day. There will be days when we have to complete a job or two,left over from the previous day, but that is okay. This is just what it takes to maneuver this wonderful life we have. Take the day and run with it. Spin and jump over the obstacles running at you from all sides. Try to avoid being hit! If you are hit and cannot complete your run…get up! Start again from where you left off…move forward…and do your best to stay “Ahead of the Game!”
Saw this and had to post it…This reminds me of you…What was I thinking?
Those little thoughts that accompany the unique peek into our deepest essence of humor….We have seen them on our Status Updates and have put them on our own Update…
True statements that make us smile as we go through our day are just a part of this culture. My page is filled with inspirational thoughts and quotes from friends along with coffee pics and favorite song videos. Family gatherings recently attended and bragging sessions keep us connected no matter the distance.
The virtual scrapbook of our lives, complete with cartoon characters and journal entries, deepens the understanding of our individuality. These personal tidbits allow those with similar personalities to be drawn into a closer knitted group. This is, at times, a scary scenario!
“Confession!”. I try to be positive everyday when updating my Status.” I would rather cause a smile and have someone LOL than reply “What’s wrong?”. My friends and family deserve to start their day with a smile…”Don’t you agree?”
I have thought provoking and Kleenex grabbing Status Updates on my wall too! We, as a group, have recently lost a little saint to cancer. His life, through this devastating disease, was journaled on FaceBook.
Remember the movie “You’ve Got Mail”? “Those three little words changed our lives forever….at least until the iPhone. Every time someone updates their FaceBook or replies to one of your comments notifications chime their way into your day. Annoying and inconvenient at times but a wonderful source of positive communication. The assortment of notification tones are as humorous as the personalities posting on my wall. “It is a good thing we, for the most part, turn off the sound during practices and church.”. (Mahna Mahna).
Search for a cartoon or picture that speaks to you and makes you smile…post it…and share the ROFLOL with those close to you.
“Really Mom!” “Not in front of the other kids!” “Just drop me here!” We have heard these statements before. They rise up from the depths of fear and hit us smack between the eyes. Our sweet little angels no longer need the last-minute love and advice from Mom and Dad. But….Now that they are older….We can retaliate and do what we do best. Embarrass the heck out of them just for fun!
The wonderful opportunity to totally humiliate them, in a loving way of course, and remind them the “We brought them into this world and We can take them out!” I don’t know how many times I heard that while I was living with my parents. The stories and tales of a child’s actions and decisions will hold many in their seat. The pictures are laid out and strewn to provide the viewer optimal visibility. “This is when the Goat licked him right in his face!….and this is when he got stuck in the rails of the stairway!…He wanted to help me cook and dropped the flour container.” Let’s not forget the girlfriend pictures on the phone. We show everyone….and then we see their pictures. It is a parent’s right to pursue this natural, God-given, form of bragging. After all, we are bragging on them…even if they don’t see it that way.
We sing them the songs they loved to sing, as a child, and they fuss and beg you to stop. “I’ll go up stairs”, “I’m outta here!” are familiar phrases spoken by the almost men in my house. What they don’t realize is the joy we, as parents, receive from seeing the sparkle of light in their eyes as they flash on the memory. “They need to be reminded as much as we do!” We stir the embers of memories and find that they still hold stories of their own. They share what they remember and we add what they have forgotten. “I can remember what I did as a small child because of similar “Memory Sessions” with my parents.” There is nothing wrong with this…They will enjoy “Reliving their Childhood” too as they begin making their own memories.
Grandparents cling to their children’s memories and to the new ones being made with their grandchildren. My dad calls the stories of my sons “isms”. They are specific and funny. My second son recently returned from a 2 week visit with my parents. He recalled a fact trying to show me he knew something I did not know. “Did you know that the uncle, I am named for, used to live in Piper, Alabama?” “Yes I did, I wrote a paper about that very topic in High School.” “I received and A and my teacher quoted me as a source for her Master’s Thesis.” Mom 2 points…son 1. I talked with him about Piper and filled in the gaps in this part of his history.
Parents start out reading Dr. Seuss and end telling the family history to the next generation. Historians and Bards of sorts! This is not a new twist to parenthood. This is just the way it is! Parents have been doing this very task to preserve the family name and history. The stories are passed down through the generations, sometimes as fishing tales, changing to capture the hook in a child’s mind. “Did I tell you about when?…”Do you remember the story about?”…and my favorite “When I was your age!”
“Relive their Childhood..It Can be Fun!” Maybe we do it out of necessity…not wanting to forget how much they needed us. The tender little bundle of joy, gazing up at us with love and happiness, is almost grown and no longer shows absolute love in a simple expression. “Boy, do I miss that little face!” But there is a spark of love in their look of fear when the pictures come out. The beaming spirit reveals itself in quick disputes….”No mom..not the baby pictures!” They are proud, on the inside, when we bring the monuments to their childhood out and parade them proudly to those in the room. These are people who are important to them and they need to know exactly what they are getting in to being associated with our sons. “Did that sound sarcastic?”
We, as parents, do enjoy “Reliving their Childhood“. We need to make all the sentimental connections we can…because we LOVE them and need to remind them in ways other that verbal. But no one said we could not have FUN while we do it! So..pull out the baby pictures and the stories…make some snackies for them…and “Relive their Childhood..It Can be Fun!”
We all have those irritating issues of life that cause us to speak our mind. We can only take so much! We get pushed till we can’t take any more and finally grab that proverbial Soap Box and tell anyone that will listen. Here are just a few of my “Soap Box Topics“. “Don’t worry I will not make a speech.”
“Soap Box Topics“:
Why do the television executives cancel the good shows and only leave the bad ones? (one of our family favorites is suddenly ending…)
Why is there nothing on television, worth watching, when big sports events or political debates are scheduled?
Why does it rain pretty much everyday when you decide to start walking again?
Why does the phrase “In one ear and out the other” represent my son?
What do you mean the pipeline was put on the back burner?
Why is it that we must choose from the least likely to find a candidate?
Why is it that milk and gasoline are in a price war and they can’t decide which one will cost more?
My car doesn’t work!
Why do some people complain about not having any money but they still shop till they drop spending more on one item than I spend on a years worth of clothes?
Another celebrity bites the dust!
Long traffic lights! (I just had to add this one…my 18 year old has a few he tries to avoid.)
The Nightly News!
Politically Correct is being forced down our throats!
Why do Brownies hate me? ( I can’t eat just one!)
We all have these fist-clenching topics that tear at our very fiber. Why can’t people see the truth we see? How can we live in a world where “Rose Colored Glasses” are worn by most of the population? The sad thing is the fact that there are more topics I left off the list…
I tried to choose some of the funnier and everyday “Soap Box Topics“. We can all identify! What would you add to this list?
And in particular we are looking for a liberal church. This is a 180 degree change for me. In all my Navy moves, I have looked for the conservative church. My friend and I met at a Bible study which began in an Anglican church (read – very conservative). She’s a fine Christian woman who after her horrible marriage was over found herself in a homosexual relationship. I’m not defining her by who she loves. I’m defining her as a Christian. Anyway her special someone lives in the D.C. area, so she needs a friend here. This is where you put your faith to your feet. We have been visiting churches, especially liberal churches. And I have to ask myself if I care if people wonder if I am gay. Unfortunately, I do. I’m working on that. (I’m not, by the way. It bothers me that I feel the need to say that.)
Anyway the Anglican church in America (a congregation of which is where we met) was begun as a response to the Episcopal church’s ordination of homosexuals. Ergo, she feels uncomfortable there now, even though we still affiliate with a Bible study. At the same time, I am missing singing in a choir (as the Anglican church only has a praise team, and I don’t care for praise songs very much). So it makes sense that I visit churches with her.
We went to a downtown church today where we learned about Jonah (and the people of Nineva, who God loved, too). We sang this old, old song, and I wondered, considering the poem I intend to teach on Wednesday, how many people heard the very words they were singing. Also, when if the last time you openly, loudly proclaimed your sin to the world in song (with a magnificent pipe organ, I might add)?
by Charles Welsey
Depth of mercy! Can there be
Mercy still reserved for me?
Can my God His wrath forbear,
Me, the chief of sinners, spare?
I have long withstood His grace,
Long provoked Him to His face,
Would not hearken to His calls,
Grieved Him by a thousand falls.
I my Master have denied,
I afresh have crucified,
And profaned His hallowed Name,
Put Him to an open shame.
Now incline me to repent,
Let me now my sins lament,
Now my foul revolt deplore,
Weep, believe, and sin no more.
There for me the Savior stands,
Shows His wounds and spreads His hands.
God is love! I know, I feel;
Jesus weeps and loves me still.
Peach State says, “I would have to say the writer of this poem may be in a very deep valley. His life is just going in circles. He cannot seem to forgive a person, situation, or himself. I thought the poem was very sad.”
Heart of Dixie answers . . . No, I don’t think so. I see “motes” right off the bat. There are a lot of people who cannot see that they have motes in their eyes. But the light swords through it. Sometimes violence is required to take away sin. Also, didn’t Jesus say that anger is the same as murder. The man is simply human: he has anger in his heart. There are a lot of people who think they are sin free, but we aren’t. None of us are. Anyway, the motes are frightening in their numbers. Our sin problem is so big.
Lots of violent images – stabbing, swords, “discomfort” (the word I am most afraid to hear from a doctor). By the way, the sanitized word discomfort to describe wrenching pain is analogous to the way we sanitize sin. “We confess that we have sinned against you in thought, word, and deed. By what we have done and by what we have left undone. We have not loved you with our whole hearts. We have not loved our neighbors as ourselves . . .” is way off from “I have murder in my heart.”
Also I think the hand wringing imagry is interesting for the passing of the peace. Hand wringing implies worry – a realization that we are flawed, perhaps, and that someone will uncover our secret.
Also people are doing a lot of things to try to get to God, but nothing WE do can take away that murder in our heart. I think it’s a realistic look at the human condition. Church is not a production, but an experience. If we view it as a production, it will never help us get to God.
Yet, the church itself if a sanctuary. It’s a place of refuge despite the flawed people. There is more. Look at it again. What do you see?
by Mark Jarman
After the praying, after the hymn-singing,
After the sermon’s trenchant commentary
On the world’s ills, which make ours secondary,
After the communion, after the hand-wringing,
And after peace descends upon us, bringing
Our eyes up to regard the sanctuary
And how the light swords through it, and how, scary
In their sheer numbers, motes of dust ride, clinging–
There is, as doctors say about some pain,
Discomfort knowing that despite your prayers,
Your listening and rejoicing, your small part
In this communal stab at coming clean,
There is one stubborn remnant of your cares
Intact. There is still murder in your heart.